Ever wondered what transforms a normal rest of the UK person into a miserable, soul-less Londoner? Well let me tell you…
1. TOURISTS. SO MANY TOURISTS.
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| THEY JUST WALK SO SLOWLY AND STARE AT EVERY GOD DAMN THING. YES, IT’S A GIANT CLOCK. Move on. |
2. You cringe every time someone suggests going to a ‘tourist hotspot‘ for fear of becoming….ONE OF THEM.
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| No….not MADAME TUSSAUDS!!! |
3. Utter a single word on the London Underground to someone and they’ll think you’re a psychopath.
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| Next stop, the funny farm! |
4. Therefore you become an arrogant tosser.
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| I KNOW you just didn’t ask me to have a nice day. |
5. You freak the hell out, like a child at Christmas, when everything outside of London is cheaper than what it is in London.
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I’m sorry the bottle of wine is only £7 in here? Wait I’m in a bar/pub and not my house or friend’s house drinking. OMFG.
I’m moving. |
6. You quickly learn to hate public transport. Unless you can afford Ubers everywhere.
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| Wait, I pay how much for this?! |
7. You’re probably the poorest person in the whole of the UK. Even though you earn £30k a year.
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| Ooo PAYDAY. So take away Rent, Bills and other necessities I’m left with a grand total – Haha WTF?! |
This is all done tongue in cheek, so don’t take it too seriously. To be honest, it’s all true. Not gonna lie.
HATERS GONNA HATE!
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